she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
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