I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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