i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
my liver is dry heaving
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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