wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
