your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
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There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
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I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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