how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
