you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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