The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
This is evicking siegelnvs
This is fucking ridiculous*
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?