it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
