Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
