In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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