get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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