sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Is it normal to miss your booty call?
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
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