just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
