I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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