I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
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Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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