when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
she woke up with a sticky ear
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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