Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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