I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
