At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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