so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
