Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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