Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
