Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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