just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
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