Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Randomize
