Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize