whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
