My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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