Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
