that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Randomize
