i don't plan on having that self control this summer
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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