No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
Girls should come with a carfax report
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
