Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
