I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
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