I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
