she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
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