Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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