soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
