Do you still have your period?
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
