You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize