Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Randomize