peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
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