He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize