she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
