Soap is not a condiment
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
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