just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
