Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
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