I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
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I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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