So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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