im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick