Whod you bang
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize